I'm A Story Teller

writing, seeing, living


Welcome To My Space Ship

(Your beautiful where ever you go)


Of course I want to be the first Plein Air Artist in space. What fun and valuable paintings they would become. Painted right in space. I would be floating in space. Oil tubes and brushes attached with wires. Easel attached to my space suit with a telescoping arm. The warm solar sun on my back lighting up on my canvas and shining up earth from millions of miles away. Beautiful particle colors of the stars in the galaxy. Me floating upside down and right side up getting new perspectives and angles, no top, no bottom. Creating compositions that I never thought of when living on earth.

After painting and floating around in space listening to my pirated downloaded music with my cool extra bass headphones inside my helmet listening to Vishnu Lounge Dub (mix), I would go back to the planet Mars in my mini rocket rover with oversize knobby off road tires. Unzip my space suit and space breathing gear, and pop out my head from my helmut. Leaning my new painting against the wall of the self contained glass house. Looking at the work I did today as shooting meteors pass over my roof. My new girlfriend a Martian woman named Adul with beautiful long purple hair, one blue eye and the other bright green shining a light beam at me. She would put one of her three arms around me and hug me and kiss me. Her skin a light lavender, her oversized lips big and soft. Kisses that last for hours. She took off her Martian clothes and sat on my legs and made love to me as I kissed one of her three nipples. She gave off nitrogen steam from her warm body as we made love. The steam fell to the ground and made hissing noises.

That was a fantasy I wanted to live!

I was driving my car up and down and up steep hills of San Francisco almost reaching the stars. I was showing my Korean lady friend the city. She feared crowds but started to feel more comfortable and secure in my 1988 Mercedes. We both were listening to NPR on the car radio as we bounced down the steep streets of San Francisco over cable car tracks. The sun reflecting from building windows. There was a radio program on the car radio about Mars. The radio show was about a one way space travel to Mars. MarsOne was the program. This was very interesting for me. I want to go to Mars I told my friend. But one way? Never to return to earth? Never to see my children or grandson or my Korean lady friend? But still there was part of me that wanted the isolation of being by myself. And on the red planet Mars. A whole new world to discover and put into my memory bank. A whole new red dusty planet that never had man set foot on it. Maybe discovering a Martian beauty to live with me.(hehe)! I certainly had creative visions. And a desire to go.
Radio announcer:

Human Settlement on Mars

Mars One will establish a permanent human settlement on Mars. One person will depart every two years, starting in 2026. Our first unmanned mission will be launched in 2020. Join the Global Mars One Community and participate in our mission to Mars.

I heard the news announcer describing the mission. I felt a desire to go to Mars.

Human Settlement on Mars

Mars One designed a mission using only existing technology. In the coming years, a demonstration mission, communication satellites, two rovers and several cargo missions will be sent to Mars. A reliable living environment will be waiting for the astronauts when they leave Earth.

The next day I was sitting at the Piccolo Cafe in Sausalito with my lady friend. Looking out to the bay at the sparkling city. In the reflecting water not far from us was this billionaires grey yacht surrounded small speed boats protecting the big boat. I kept eying the boat.
My friend thought I was totally insane. Why would I risk my life to never return to earth to live my life normal. To give up this beautiful view of San Francisco and live on Mars. Maybe there is a part of me that wanted not to live normal life as most people do. Maybe I have this curiosity of living an experience that very few would live.

As I looked across the bay to the Billionaires boat, I thought all that money he has, huge palace, fancy Ferrari , beautiful women.and still not feel I would be satisfied as much as being one of the first people to be a painter in space. And on Mars!

What about God?

Being Jewish. Does God enter into this decision. Are we going against the the big picture. Does he want us to colonize on other planets. To mate with foreign species. What would Moses do?

Human Life In Space

Human space exploration is dangerous at all levels. After more than fifty years of humans traveling from Earth to space, the risk of space flight is similar to that of climbing Mount Everest.
Mars is an unforgiving environment where a small mistake or accident can result in large failure, injury, and death. Every component must work perfectly. Every system (and its backup) must function without fail or human life is at risk.

What if there are other beings there. Can we mix species. Will there be funny looking babies. Are we going against God’s design?

I don’t mind finding a Martian woman, meet her family. Maybe she will be a good woman for me. Maybe she will like art or be very spiritual and become a good friend. Make beautiful love together. Watch a Martian red sunset over the rocky terrains. See a red and orange dust storm against the sun. I will show her photos and videos of trees and waterfalls and what Earth people think Martians look like. Or she will show me a underground city with modern technology. Water being made from rocks. Plants growing with new life. Eating her cooked meal of strange plants and root vegetables.

A sponsor to Mars.

Remember that billionaire with his big boat? I was set up with my easel and canvas and paints, painting a scene of San Francisco from across the bay in Sausalito.
The city was in the background and his boat was in my painting. A man in an Arab turban and rough bearded face was watching me paint as I was listening to music from my phone. I did not know it he was watching me paint. He started talking to me. My earphones were loud so i did not pay to much attention. Then I stopped painting. He asked me how much did I want of that painting?

I told him $950. And he wrote me a check for $10,000 I was surprised. I told him he made a mistake. It’s $950 and he said I don’t buy paintings under $10,000 he said either take the check or I don’t take the painting. I took the check.

We started talking about art and I was joking with him about being the first painter on Mars.

He turned out to be Prince Amir Bin Abudallahaziz Al Saud he said just call me Amir 1
He lives in Dubai and Paris, France. Originally from Riyach, Saudi Arabia.
Amir told me he is proud to have studied Global affairs, spiritual enlightenment, Jesus Christ and Allah. The one thing he really admires is art and artist. He said he tried painting when he was a child but his parents did not encourage him. They wanted him to grow up with proper education in business and someday take over his fathers oil rigs.

Amir offered to pay for my one way trip on Mars One “The Human Settlement on Mars”

I thought he was joking. He donated ten million dollars towards the project. This donation certainly got the attention of the team from the Mars One project. Especially Bas Lansdorp M.Sc., Co-Founder & Chief Executive Officer (The Netherlands) – Bas Lansdorp has never been one to let bold ventures intimidate him. A born entrepreneur, he sees potential and opportunity where others shy away. Gifted with an articulate vision and genuine enthusiasm, he moves people with his passion for science and the human mission to Mars. Bas was thrilled to have me come on board.

I was one of 100 candidates for the trip.

United States President John F. Kennedy said in his famous Rice Moon speech “We choose to go to the Moon, not because it is easy, but because it is hard”.

My training took place in Mongolia. Similar to Martian harsh environment. Hot as hell and colder than hell freezing over. For two months every year for two years no contact with anybody but the technicians. Teaching me how to take The Rover apart and repairing it. I ate freeze dried caned foods and could not shower. I used moist wipe towels to clean myself. No contact with my Korean lady friend or my family. Slept in a small space the size of a small walk in closet. No daylight or night moon glow. I floated in simulated space. Wore my space suite for three weeks without taking it off. No sex for two months. Not even by myself. My toe nails grew longer and so did my hair and beard. I slept only four hours at a time. Read manuals about how to take care of machinery and how to take care of myself in case I got sick. No doctors or anybody to help. I ate a freeze dried burrito and it tasted terrible. I had better burritos at Seven Eleven. I was on my own. Everyday got harder, I wanted to go home but could not go. I wanted to see the sky or go for a walk in the woods but could not. I cried and laughed. I watched Tom Hanks Cast Away movie and wanted to trade places with Tom on a deserted island in the Pacific spearing fish and breaking coconuts.

After two months I came out of the training station. Mongolian spring was beginning. Flowers in the fields were blooming. Water from the snow was melting. It was as though I was just seeing it for the first time.

The other ten months I painted and prepared my self to be very creative. I painted almost every day, Especially outside. In wind, in rain and also under hot sun. Big and small paintings. sometimes three in one day. Painting in Sausalito in front of Piccolo Cafe where the tourist eat and drink coffee or wine with cool music and me painting live. Tourist from Korea, China, Ireland and all over the globe. I also painted many scenes of the Golden Gate Bridge from both the city and Marin shores. Watching huge cargo ships go by. The bridge is never boring to paint. Sometime half of the Golden Gate Bridge disappears in a fog and makes the painting more interesting. Sometimes I would be way up in Marin Headlands and the bridge was small with the white sparkling city behind it and to the right the ocean was infinite. I painted the ocean and at times I could see Korea (almost).
In my studio at night I sharpened my skills and painted large and small sunflowers or pears and apples. Colorful flowers.

A 1937 Dodge truck in the wine country sitting in a field became a favorite, Rusting in a field. I could not paint enough of the truck paintings. Colorful rust. I told people it was a self portrait. The truck was me rusting away.

After painting over a thousand paintings and hours of understanding may art. Like a Ninja sword master. A fighter, I felt I was ready to go to the one way journey to Mars.

After months of training and preparing technically and emotionally I was ready for my voyage. I was ready for anything.

Lift Off

Snuggled in like a pea in a pod, I was lifting off in my small spaceship about the size of a Winabago camper . wearing the latest technology space suit. Steam from under my rocket and roaring sounds from the blasters. Metal to metal clanging and shaking sounds. Shrieking noises, I thought we were falling apart as I was lifting up.

Sitting in the most advanced space ship designed by man with todays electronic technology. NASA made an engine that could take me to Mars in 10 weeks in its warp drive, a successful electromagnetic propulsion drive. Metal bars around me like a bird cage. 4’x5′ environment with four windows to look out. Two in front to see where I was going and one on each side. Buttons and dials and electronic read outs all around me. Voices from NASA telling me we have lift off. Suri asking me should I bring an umbrella. As I look out of the space ship window back to earth the planet was getting smaller, I was imaging people looking up at me as they got smaller and looking up to the sky as it was getting bluer and darker. In my mind I was saying did I forget something? Did I turn the stove off? Sun flares were star bursting through my window as I was heading upwards towards unknown Mars. Then all of a sudden pure darkness. Pitch black. Nothing to see, an ominous darkness. Now, this wasn’t the dark of night descending. When you have a darkness of this kind, there’s a magician at work somewhere behind It. I really felt alone. My rocket ship was dancing a waltz in space. Days and nights of blackness except dials and monitors. Freaky black and no lights anywhere. My rockets ship was heading fast into a big black nothing. A shooting star and a meteor passed by.

A bright light appeared.

Then I looked up and there was this beautiful woman standing in front of me inside my space ship. She had magnificent dark purple hair with round asian eyes and lavender skin. She said to me. I have come to marry you and waiting for your reply. She gives him a small bag with crystals from the meteor and leaves him. She was special, was she real?

Days later I passed by the moon. It was very bright. Amazing light reflecting from the sun on it’s surface. The moon’s colors were grey and yellow. I saw little craters on the moon. My rocket ship zipped by. Back into the dark void. Where was the beautiful woman, I wanted to meet her again.

Had I not met her my space travel adventure would not as be interesting, It would of have been the boring norm.

(For some reason I was craving a Mars candy bar. I thought to myself that was funny.)

Then I heard a super loud bang. A meteor rock hit my space ship on the right side and then another on my left side and one on the rear of the rocket. Throwing me into a wobble. I thought that the rocket would fall apart. Radio contact with earth said that the rocket had suffered a 1/8 inch by three feet fracture and I would have to go outside and weld it or the crack on the rocket would get bigger and would break in two.

I put on my triple layer outside space suit on and opened the hatch. Floated out into space with attached lines to the craft. A bright LED light I was caring showed me the crack on the ship. I lit my arc torch and a bright blue light with yellow and red flame came from it and I welded away. The light seemed to light up the entire universe. As I was welding I had to pee. And I did. “First pee for mankind in space”. One hour later I was back inside the rocket ship and headed onward to mars.

Before I left on to my voyage my Korean lady friend on earth packed me some Bin Bin Bob food
Yummy brown rice steamed vegetables and tofu with a cooked egg. This made me miss earth even more. I liked the food it made me feel warm inside. And started to mss her.

I had tapped her photo onto the dashboard next to other photos of other friends. My computer monitor was logged into facebook. I was getting many likes and well wishes. Thousands of requests to become friends. I had gone viral! China, Mongolia, Paris, New York, San Francisco and all over the globe, people wished me well.
A Spectacular Universe

A week had gone by and now entering an amazing visual universe. Galaxy of stars and gas colors. I saw the large Magellanic cloud of the Milky Way. Then a view of the Andromeda Galaxy. Incredible visuals that I could not describe in words. Photography was great. A painting even greater. There has to be life out here. So I took out my paint box and a canvas. I painted my first painting in space. I used purple instead of black for my darks. Lime green and yellow dots for stars. Orange for gases and lavender for more stars. Then I splattered my paints to achieve the tiny stars. From so far away I tried to find earth but could not see it anymore so I imagined it and painted Earth very small with the north pole white caps against the colorful universe. I feel so good and relieving my stress from this big decision of space travel by creating paintings.

Then another bright light appears and forms the same beautiful woman. This time she comes to me and asks if I wants to kiss her? I can’t I said, and tell her she is not real and would only be kissing a mirage. At that moment she disappears.

A few minutes later she comes back. This time very old and ragged and pale. She was a walking dead woman. Frighting nightmare. I started to scream, but no one could hear me. I was sweating and scared. Then I passed out. I was out for hours or maybe days it seemed like months. When I woke up all I heard was the beep, beep, sound of the monitors that were monitoring me and the spaceship. Then The beeping and bleeping stopped. I woke up to total silence. The humming of a fan bringing in oxygen could be heard. The rocket motors had stopped. A hissing sound came from the engines.


I opened the spaceship hatch. My outside gear was on me. I saw an incredible bright red landscape with a golden red sky. Small dust particles floated though the air. In the distance the mountains were purple and orange. The wind twirled the colorful sand. A colorful landscape. Almost sunset on an island but no water. It lasted for hours. Colorful crystal sand had collected on rocks. Reflecting like small glass diamonds. Winds moved the sand into swirls. The planet felt empty. Empty of life and weird. I saw shadows move and thought it was someone watching me. The wind made noises as it blew through the valley and slammed small rocks against walls. My footprints disappeared into the sand within seconds from the sandy swirls. No history to be made here. Nothing could live here.No camels or snakes. No lizards. Nothing had lived here ever. Why would man want to colonize on mars? Not a tree in sight. No tumbleweed. I heard a flapping sound. It was the wind moving a tarp that the early space robots used to cover up the house they built. A sound that was constant like the edge of a road hearing cars go by came from wind cutting its way through the valley.It was about 5;00 PM and the evening light was very bright and warm.
I found my pre-built house. It was partially covered with sand. A white structure sticking out of the sand. Round windows. With steel beams. Sort of the Jetson looking house. And six large power tower with wires connecting them.

Then I ask myself. What the fuck am I doing here by myself. Alone and as far I as I can be from another human. And I came to realize why we exist and started to miss earth, and my Korean friend. “We share what little knowledge we learn in our lives”. Playing the piano, singing, writing and seeing life our way. Mine was sharing my art. Painting as pure as I could. My Korean lady friend sharing her healing knowledge. We all have something to pass on. A world without humans is a dying world. But any adventure can teach us.

Inside the prefab house was everything I needed. Kitchen, A self sustaining garden growing vegetables and fruit. Extra freezers. A comfortable bed and living room. I took my first shower since I left earth. Felt terrific. Communication to earth was clear and i had six monitors to watch live webcams in different countries. Voice command to Lisa the robot was my only friend. She monitored my health and also the living situation.

My art studio was was fully equipped and ready to go.

I painted new visions on Mars. Colors and ideas came from me. Alone to fully let out my feelings. No one watching me. Listening to my inner self. I painted two or three paintings ad day. On Mars the days are longer and Martian sunsets last for hours into the night. Shooting stars are closer and make sounds as they pass over head.The galaxy at night has billions of stars.
I was looking at Gods creation of the universe. and realizing how vast the universe is. It seemed to expand for ever. Further and further. I now was not afraid to be alone. I was with a God. Even though I wanted to be with my Korean lady.

At 3:33 A.M I was awaking to a bright light inside my space home. Through a light swirl like a hurricane with color light glitters appeared a figure. First a dark shape then a form of a figure. A woman appeared She was very beautiful. Her skin was lavender. Her hair long and dark purple, her eyes one green and the other blue. She has three breasts. Her arms were like snakes dancing around me.A figure that curved and when she walked she shuffled her feet like Asian women do when serving green tea to their master. She was gentle and brought with her a glass of warm water that she drank.

I named her Adul, After my friend Luda but only backwards.

She talked in a gentle voice that I could understand her language. Adul knew all about me. Why I came to the planet Mars and knew my name and what I painted. She knew I was an artist. She was also the spirit that appeared on my space ship three times. Steam came from her as she talked and hot water poured onto the floor of my space home and evaporated almost immediately.

We talked about Mars and how there was an underground city that she would take me to. She described it as another dimension. A city that can not be seen by humans,

Then our gravity pulled us together. I kissed her. Her lips were juicy and bright red. Steam poured out onto the floor. I also was feeling a warmth. We ended up making love as she laid on her back in my bed. WOW!!! was this a fantasy or was she real? Her three arms wrapped around me, making me feel wanted. I kissed her three breasts.
We made strong love. Then I was tired. When I woke up she was gone.

I found some numbers scribbled on my wall. It looked like a Einstein math code. Lots of divisions and percentages. I figured them out and soon it took me to this new dimension that she talked about. Humans can not see. Butt somehow I broke the code. It was music notes that were encrypted.

There was a city. Filled with people on Mars. Lavender people women and men. Long hair. Three arms. Steam coming from everywhere. Hissing sounds as the steam evaporated from their body. Children with dread locks. Running and playing. The Martians did not need cars. They dissolved and appeared when they wanted to travel. I was the first Earthling to ever break into this dimension. But no one bothered to look at me as weird. Martians had traveled to Earth for many years. We could not see them, but they could see us. Sit next to us. Watch us. Heard us. And danced with us. Even when we went to the bathroom they were with us.

When people died they would watch their souls go up and talk with them. Not to worry the Martians said to the souls. All will be bright.

I wanted to se Adul but had no way of contacting her. Almost like trying to find a beautiful woman I once saw and never to see her again. Only she could find me.

The streets in the city on Mars were filled with garbage. Garbage from earth, Plastic bottles and cans. Martians had this fascination about collecting everything. Old TV sets and 8 track tapes and 78 records. Old microwaves and broken cell phones and computers. They liked electronics, computers stacks were mountain high. Circuit boards and micro chips. Robots took old computers apart and rebuilt new technology from them. They recycled plastic bottles we threw into the our oceans and made furniture from them. The beauty was Martians knew how to rebuild and reuse them. But in a new way. They built robots to do their work for them. Martians mostly did not work or have jobs. They had no expenses. No payments, so there was no need to work. Food and essentials were free. Cafes were filled with beautiful healthy looking Martians.

Music was great and food delicious. They wore cool clothing. Sex was not a pressure. Most people felt comfortable to be with the one they were with. Modern and hip architecture. Conversations between them was loud and friendly. Lots of coffee and tea and special Martian health drinks and organic foods. A perfect world. They did not want to live the way Earth people lived. Violence and corporate greed.

Robots did the work. Grew their foods which were simple and healthy but made to look like beans, lettuce and imitation beef. Vegetarians. Martians were healthy. No cancers, no pains. Mostly smiles and life expectancy was 180 years. Average family was three children.

I wandered around the red Martian city. I went to a museum for Martian art. There hung original Martian paintings. A Gauguin, Picasso, Rembrandt and Van Gough. I looked at Starry Night painting and wondered how it ended up on Mars. Then I realized it was created by robots. Looked and felt as emotional as the original painting. Pre-programmed robots had created the same emotions as Van Gogh had when he painted Starry Night. Sunflower painting was as beautiful.

There was no need for a real person to express their art feelings. A computer robot could do it. Martians became viewer and not dewars.

Then I wondered? What will happen to real art, real emotions, feelings that we are born with and develop as we live and grow, and how art has helped us get through the nights of who we are?

At that point I went back to my space house that earth people built for me on Mars. I was upset. Put my head into my hands and started to think. What the future was going to be. No emotions, no feeling. Just viewers and no doers I quickly gathered my art materials, oil paints, brushes and containers to mix my paints with walnut oil and a few blank canvases.

I transferred myself back into the Martian dimension and found myself on a busy street with replicas of earth building but montaged into new shapes.

There I set up my easel and added a wide horizontal blank canvas. And put on my earphones to listen to some of my favorite classical Bach Cello Solo played by Anner Bylsma. Also Miles Davis & Gil Even playing Concerto De Arenjauz and started to paint the scene in front of me. I felt an energy grow in my chest. Emotions that were not mechanical but from a deep place. I got deeper and deeper into my feelings. As I painted a crowd of Martians surrounded me. They never saw someone painting a real panting live in front of them. Kids looked amazed. Women would smile. Men wondered and asked how I did that. They would talk to me about a Picasso they owned but did not know it was not the real painting. Only a robot painting of Picasso “The Old Guitarist”. I started to realize that the Martians were deprived to express themselves. A world of replicas. A world of viewers. A world of not doers.

Adul appears

As I’m painting Adul appears and she tells me she wants to paint. I set up a canvas and give her my brushes and paints. She started to paint. Emotions so powerful come from her. Painting so strong and powerful. Emotions that have been held back most of her life. So pure, so original, so colorful. Every brush stroke, so real. She is exhausted and is tired and says she needs to sleep.

I go back to my space house. Then I lay down in my bed. Look at my Facebook and fall asleep. While I’m sleeping Adul returns me to Earth and I wake up in my bed back in my home on earth.

My cat sitting on my legs. The early sunlight and trees in my window.